13 things that happened this summer that sort of sum things up but mostly don’t

3 minute read

This summer we had a World Cup and then an Ashes and it is honestly very hard to remember even half of what took place.

Here are 13 things that took place.

The World Cup group stages

It wasn’t the sandpaper thing and it wasn’t the lying about sandpaper thing. It was the calling-back-a-team-mate-who-had-the-wild-shits thing. Absolutely despicable behaviour.

The umpire then did the finest ‘your apology is not really accepted’ face that we’ve ever seen. That was the best bit.

It was high intensity fun.

And we all agreed to blame James Vince for England’s World Cup failure and also for everything else.

It was very cool. A little too cool, perhaps. Counter-productively cool really.

In almost any other summer, this would be our number one highlight.

Weird but true fact: not everything went brilliantly for Steve Smith this summer.

Elite stroppiness, but weirdly there was one person who experienced an even stronger emotional reaction to his dismissal.

Except that it resulted in England winning a World Cup, which doesn’t feel very cricket at all now that we come to think about it.

It’s important to remember that in light of everything that followed.

England were bowled out for 67. Do you remember that? Do you remember England being bowled out for 67? That was a thing that actually happened.

And that’s where the summer ended. No other things happened after the ‘England winning a Test after getting bowled out for 67’ thing happened.

Bail-out says:

September 28, 2019 at 11:50 pm

Are county summer things allowed to have happened after England won that match or has absolutely everything been confined to the memory erasure vault? 🙁
1. King Cricket says:
  
  September 29, 2019 at 7:46 am
  
  There was definitely some county cricket in autumn. This is just the international cricket.
2. Ged says:
  
  September 29, 2019 at 11:55 am
  
  Here is a little smidgen from the fag end of the county season:
  
  http://ianlouisharris.com/2019/09/25/the-fag-end-of-the-cricket-season-lords-23-to-25-september-2019/
Bert says:

September 30, 2019 at 4:11 pm

What about that meeting where all the problems with world and English cricket were sorted once and for all? Doesn’t that make the list? I mean, imagine – one meeting that fixed every problem dogging cricket, making it the perfect game, healthy for many future decades, and attracting a new and vibrant set of supporters. All this, just there in the notes from the meeti… oh, yeh, right, er… yeh.

Carry on everyone.
1. Ged Ladd says:
  
  October 1, 2019 at 10:06 am
  
  What manner of idiots were at that meeting – capable of all that amazing problem solving and yet no-one had the savvy to take notes?
  1. Bert says:
    
    October 1, 2019 at 10:44 am
    
    Journalists, Ged, bloody journalists.
  2. King Cricket says:
    
    October 1, 2019 at 11:34 am
    
    No-one can read shorthand. Not even journalists.