Six things older than Rehan Ahmed

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Last week Rehan Ahmed became England’s youngest debutant and soon after the youngest men’s Test debutant to take a five-wicket haul. But just how young is he really? Age is famously just a number (in this case 18), so maybe we can get a clearer perspective on his youth by listing a few things that are older than him for comparison.

In the comments section of our last article, Ged Ladd said he had been thinking about the “many garments” he had which were older than Rehan Ahmed.

So let’s start with that.

1. Ged’s cricket troos

Ged didn’t actually give us the birth year for these cricket trousers – maybe he can enlighten us in the comments. He says he does still wear them though.

We’re struck that they don’t look comically old, which is an alarmingly good measure of Ahmed’s age. We don’t look at these trousers and think, “I bet there are international cricketers younger than those trousers.”

2. Nasser Hussain’s England captaincy

We know Nasser has been a commentator for a good few years now, but it’s still faintly alarming to think that Rehan Ahmed wasn’t even born when he was England captain.

Rehan missed Rob Key’s 221 against the West Indies as well, the poor bastard.

3. Bad Boys 2

Back in the days of long play VHS, one of our housemates had a single tape with Speed, Species and Bad Boys on it. Quite the hat trick, we’re sure you’ll agree. One time we all watched the tape from start to finish and then when it reached the end and automatically rewound, we pressed play again.

That was obviously a long time ago. Bad Boys 2 came out eight years after Bad Boys though, at which point Rehan Ahmed still hadn’t got round to being born. (We still haven’t seen Bad Boys 2 and probably/hopefully never will.)

4. Get Busy by Sean Paul

Absolutely true. Sean Paul was getting jiggy and crunked up before Rehan Ahmed was even born.

Obviously there are quite a lot of songs we could have chosen here. (Most of the songs really, when you think about it.) We went for a Sean Paul one though because of something he said last week.

Sean Paul quite often says “Sean da Paul” at the start of his songs and as you’d imagine, a great many cricket fans – including Cricinfo’s Vithushan Ehantharajah – can’t help but hear it as “Chanderpaul”.

Turns out that’s exactly what he’s saying. There’s a very clear example here.

Bonus Sean Paul fact: He played for the Jamaica water polo team from the age of 13 to 21.

5. Call of Duty

We’ve never played Call of Duty. In our head, we’ve always explained this away as being because it’s a “new” game, so we were slightly taken aback to learn that a whole England leg-spinning all-rounder had been grown since it first came out.

We suppose Call of Duty probably became a more prominent thing in later incarnations as online gaming took off. Our only experience of playing a first person shooter online was Goldeneye 007 during an evening exploring Belgian beers with a friend. There was a lot of materialising and then being instantly shot in the head by teenage Americans who then swore at you in an annoying teenage American way. It’s not an experience we’re keen to repeat.

If you want a cricket game that came out BRA (before Rehan Ahmed) then what about this…

6. EA Cricket 2004

It’s easy to find just the right cricket game older than Rehan Ahmed because between 1995 and 2007, EA Sports released eight versions of theirs, naming each of them by year. We’re not even sure ‘EA’ is technically part of the title. It was like an exercise in devising the least googleable name possible.

One review described Cricket 2004 as, “a game that has been continually pumped out on a yearly basis with virtually zero improvements upon its previous incarnations.” There were two more instalments after this one.

In a 2012 article looking at computer game graphics through the years, IGN awarded Cricket 2004, “worst visuals”. Here’s a whole thing we did about computer game graphics through the ages, if you’re interested in that kind of thing.

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12 comments

  1. What is Rehan Ahmed’s nickname? The standard “add a “y”” doesn’t really work.

    I used a bat last year that was definitely older than Ahmedy. And my bike is certainly older than Rehany. See what I mean?

    1. I think there were exclamations of ‘Bowling, Ray’ from behind the stumps during the third Test.

      Henceforth he shall be known as ‘Illy’ or ‘Supremo’.

    2. I’m not sure how you would write it but I’m sure I heard Ben Foakes give encouragement to “Rey”.
      In which case they are sort of adding a Y.

    3. It think that Hany is a possible option, I guess that at some point his ‘nickname’ will become common knowledge to us and we will all say ‘off course its that….’

      I would think there is also a high chance that the name he ends up with will have nothing to do with his name rather something else that he becomes better known for.

  2. I did date the trousers as c2002/2003 in my message to you, KC.

    Admittedly this is dating in the vague style of, for example, the birth year for a medieval composer, rather than a modern, verifiable date of legal transfer of a significant asset – i.e. the acquisition date of my pair of long cricket trousers.

    I could do some more detailed electronic-record-archaeology to try to find an exact date if you wish.

    Nevertheless, many thanks to you for featuring my trousers. I have never previously seen my clobber compared with elite sports-folk, gratuitously violent movies, hit songs or smash hit video games.

  3. Congratulations to Ged’s trousers for reaching this milestone. Do they still get a run out, Ged? Even if it’s just as lockdown “under the camera” lounging pants.

    I recently broke a badminton racquet that was only ten years old. This was disappointing, but it did precipitate a reassessment of the contents of my badminton bag. Six racquets in all now. One of them is a Carlton Classic that is 33 years old. Another is a Yonex Carbonex 20 that is 32 years old. None of the last test team is older than the Carlton, and only Mark Wood is older than the Yonex.

    I decided that I would use them at the next opportunity, but this meant I had to change the grip on the Carlton. After stripping off the old one I found, much to my surprise, the original grip from all those years ago. This was like an Antiques Roadshow moment. Indeed, the value of the piece has gone up from nothing to next-to-nothing as a result. Ged, when you stripped off those old cricket trousers, did you find an original and somewhat faded haft underneath, albeit still perfectly serviceable and offering a good, firm grip?

    1. Many thanks for your kind words, Bert.

      I wouldn’t dream of wearing cricket troos as lockdown lounging pants. Tracksuit bottoms are the troos of choice for that purpose.

      I am delighted to inform you that the cricket troos have indeed very recently had an outing at their spiritual home: the Lord’s Academy. The report on the event has already been submitted and will I’m sure be published on this very website in the fullness of time. Yes, there will be at least one photo of said troos in action.

      I am also pleased to inform you that, beneath the troos, there was a box of the same vintage – also BRA. This apparel ensures that the original (in my case unfaded) haft remains serviceable, regardless of my poor shot selection.

      Mercifully, the action photographs, taken by Daisy, spare the viewer even the faintest glimpse of what might reside beneath the troos.

  4. A garment from 2002? A racquet from 1990? After the initial “How old ARE people around here?” reaction, I started to look around to see if I do have something that I have treasured for a while (perhaps not quite to the same degree as Ged treasures his ultra-faded haft, but to a reasonable level). I did find one hoodie from my graduate school – given I graduated in 2009, this must have been with me from around 2006 or 07. This discovery has made me happy today morning (after I had to stay up all night thanks to two sick kids), so thanks KC, Ged, and Bert.

  5. Imagine my delight when I realised today that some sports socks I wear are from C&A.
    They must be of a considerably older vintage.
    I miss C&A, sadly.

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