If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, please send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Daisy writes…

Ged and I went to a supper and talk at Lord’s about the book Being Geoffrey Boycott. Ged has written up the evening.

On arrival, when we first looked out of the window, we saw a fox on that resplendent Lord’s pitch. A magnificent fox, it was. You get a very high class of fox in St John’s Wood.

Ged said that the fox looked indifferent to cricket and that we needed a photograph for King Cricket. But by the time I got my camera/phone out, the fox had wandered off.

This, as depicted in the above picture, might be the first known example of an animal displaying indifference to the idea of displaying indifference towards cricket.

Ged, being a bit of a geek, thought we should nevertheless have a picture of a fox on a cricket pitch for King Cricket readers to see. So Ged collaborated with Dall-E and produced the following picture.

It looks more like a fox stealing a run than an indifferent fox, but still.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, please send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Dr Colin Abernathy writes…

The plot thickens. As we return to Washington, DC, Sir Dave demonstrates a very relaxed attitude towards Jhulan Goswami bowling characteristically beautifully in the Australia-India Women’s Test.

It seems to me that Jhulan has the easy action of a Glenn McGrath with the longevity of a Jimmy Anderson and the batting approach of a late-stage Stuart Broad, and also smiles much more than any male player I can think of. I worry ever more that he has scant interest in the longest form of the game. I just don’t know what I did wrong. I showed him the YouTube videos of David Gower and Michael Holding and Shane Watson’s Front Pad at their respective zeniths. He showed me his empty, fluffy balls.

Further fuelling this fear, he was also fairly rapt watching Kent win the T20 Blast a couple of weeks ago, but that was largely because I was shouting and jumping around so much. (Which is why I have no photographic evidence, but rest assured, he was very struck by Jordan Cox’s fielding antics.) Immediately going out for dinner and trying to explain to one’s Franco-Californian in-laws that this is the greatest Kent team since the halcyon days of Carl Hooper and Alan Igglesden was a frustrating endeavour. (I grew up running on the outfield to get Aravinda de Silva’s autograph and doing school projects on Kent’s Great Wicketkeeper-Batsmen. You can see why I was needed in America.)

Please write more about Matthew Hayden.

P.S. I am fully aware of how mental the above sounds. I suppose sounding mental is the price of being a cricket fan these days. On top of the actual prices, obviously.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, please send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Professor Colin Abernathy writes:

I was going simply to offer this picture of my cat, Sir David Cattenborough, being conspicuously indifferent to Virat Kohli’s 50 in the 3rd Test [v England last summer], on a window ledge in Oakland, California (where we [were] staying)…

… when I came across this picture of said cat being conspicuously interested in the women’s Hundred in Washington, DC (where we live)…

Some hypotheses:

• The women’s Hundred was a resounding success for the ECB’s untapped feline market
• Cats don’t have the attention for Test cricket
• Cats respect Amy Jones as an extremely good cricketer
• Something about the experience of flying across America affects cats’ cricket-format preferences

Please write more about Matthew Hayden.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, please send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Daisy writes:

Ged and I went to Radlett, where we joined “Yorkshire Simon” at the Middlesex v Durham match. 

Simon presented us with a prized yellow courgette.

I photographed Ged with said vegetable. 

The photograph might represent:

a) A vegetable being conspicuously indifferent to cricket;

b) Ged being conspicuously indifferent to his “rude vegetable picture” pose;

c) Yorkshire Simon being conspicuously indifferent to the Middlesex v Durham cricket match

Surely the King Cricket readership should decide what this photograph depicts.

Regular King Cricket correspondent Ged Ladd has some extremely exciting Rob Key news. We are especially pleased with the revelation contained within his final sentence because the activity described is one in which we pride ourself. The knowledge that our hero is also a keen practitioner is deeply gladdening.

Regular King Cricket contributor Ged Ladd writes…

Prior to his broadcasting career, Rob Key was both a fine cricketer and also a much-lauded capybara jockey. The photographic evidence of the latter is below, following its initial publication on this very website some 12 years ago as The Greatest Post Of All Time.

On the second day of the first 2021 Test match at Lord’s, I caught said rider of animals being conspicuously indifferent to cricket while in the Allen Stand Gap beside the great pavilion, during the over before tea.

I feel bound to report to you that Rob Key was not being distracted by anything in particular – certainly not by me. This was “staring into space” indifference pure and simple.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, please send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

AP Webster writes…

You may recall my parents’ cat, Dusty, from his indifference to the Boxing Day Test back in 2019.

What with the whole global pandemic business, this weekend* (during which we have celebrated a Big Birthday for an important family member, and crucially also the first weekend I’ve been able to go into my parents’ house) has been the first opportunity for quite some time to check if Dusty has revised his stance on cricket.

This image, showing his instant response to even the channel being switched over to Sky Sports Cricket, seems conclusive evidence in this regard.

* Regular readers will be aware that “this weekend” is not a term to be taken too literally given the famously relaxed King Cricket publication schedule when it comes to reader submissions.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, please send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Rob writes: “Hello King Cricket. (Long time listener, first time caller.) Here is a picture of a cat named Omelette giving me a judging expression for watching the highlights of the 2011 England v India Test series (mainly to remind myself of an era where RP Singh was considered the height of Indian pace bowling resources).

“The former England captain AN Cook’s world class blocking-out of half-volleys from a partially interested bowling attack did not resonate with him, and as such I have no idea how to engage him with this sport.”

We asked Rob whether Omelette was perhaps exhibiting just a hint of alarm at the possibility he might catch a glimpse of play.

Rob said: “He’s really not in the mood for watching the cricket, and often, upon seeing I’m watching the cricket, will jump on the screen half of the laptop in order to close it.”

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, please send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Email readers: Sorry you’ll have to click through to the website to see the photo. Probably should have mentioned that about a year ago when we first realised that the ‘featured image’ doesn’t appear.

Miriam writes:

Here’s my cat King Ghidorah being conspicuously indifferent to a pile of cricket books.

We found these books in the shed when we were looking for the baby set for the high chair. The books had probably been there since we moved in four years ago. They are now on the daybed in the study while we make space for them.

King Ghidorah decided that the gap behind them was the perfect sleeping spot despite having a large number of other sleeping options.

I was in the next room sitting on the sofa but he didn’t sleep next to me as he doesn’t like the grey sofa, only the green sofa. We’ve never understood why.

We never did find the high chair baby set. But then we never thought there were any books left in the shed so hopefully we’ll find the baby set when we next look for something else.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

AP Webster writes: “Please find attached two pictures of my parents’ cat, Dusty (sadly not named after Dusty Rhodes), being conspicuously indifferent to the Sky pundits at lunchtime in the First Test at Centurion.

“He is also showing considerable indifference to the pile of Christmas presents in front of the TV, and does not appear to be showing the Christmas crib the level of respect that some would say it deserves.

“Feel free to choose your ‘favourite’ to use, based on which you feel conveys the most indifference.”

Needless to say, we have published both.

But just to be clear, had space been at a premium we’d have chosen this second one.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Tom sent us this, along with a decidedly minimalist explanation. He informed us that Stanley is called Stanley and that the Ashes cricket that can be seen on the TV is the Ashes.

Of those two facts, Stanley’s name is the only one we could not have deduced.

Stanley’s indifference to cricket is actually even greater than you might initially suppose. With Jonny Bairstow and Moeen Ali at the crease, it was pretty much guaranteed that there was going to be a wicket at any moment – and still Stanley ignores it.

Both Moeen and Bairstow were indeed dismissed without adding a run.

Not that Stanley gives a shit.