As in ‘returned’. He hasn’t got ankylosing spondylitis or anything.
Technically, he hasn’t been away. It just rather feels like he has. Like stumps and grass, you take for granted that Alastair Cook will at least be present for England Tests – that’s a given – however, you also expect to see an awful lot of him.
Cook is not a batsman for memorable cameos. He is a batsman who appropriates entire matches, claiming far more than his fair share of screen time. When in form, he has a tendency to monopolise play.
Christmas is a time of traditions and what could be more familiar than seeing Alastair Cook repeatedly cycle through the cut, the pull, the work to leg and the punch to off?
They say that familiarity breeds contempt, but we don’t feel contemptuous of our bottle opener or our central heating. When something does the job for which it is intended efficiently and without fuss, we’re perfectly happy with that.
It was proper hot in there today; as hot as an Edgbaston day-night test is freezing. The majority of the increasingly English crowd moved with the sun, or rather the shade, with the exception of the Barmies, which is all probably the norm for the Gee. Trumpeters operated in stereo for much of the afternoon. Several beachballs crossed the hoardings, one even managing to invade the playing area before being ruthlessly rounded up and deflated by the efficient stewards. A nascent breakaway beer snake later in the day was similarly dismantled after the police were called. Fines for persons invading the playing space and other misdemeanours wonderfully random and blue-peter totaliser-esque. Later still a myna bird gathered nesting materials from atop the great southern stand sightscreen before soaring up into the rafters. After many attempts a splendidly refreshed punter succeeded in throwing a beachball up into the second tier.
All in all a fabulous day’s test cricket.
And a fabulous match report. Wish you’d emailed it really. We do publish them all eventually, honestly.
Surely Mike can muster a culinary match report and e-mail that in for our future enjoyment?
My favorite comment I’ve seen for a long time. Well played. I’d like to hear more about the myna bird.
You’re comparing AC to central heating?
Didn’t immediately get that.
Top class. Most days that would be the thread’s winningest comment.
http://www.espncricinfo.com/series/18067/report/1122310/day/2/
So much for the “four-day Test”…
Funny game, scratch out one century and South Africa could have been bowled out for under 200.
Probably Zim’s mistake that, not scratching out that century. Tactics and that.
This is bound to reinforce the case for two-tier Tests
If that test reinforced two tier tests, heaven only knows what people will make of this
http://www.espncricinfo.com/series/11371/scorecard/743969/England-vs-Australia-4th-Investec-Test-the-ashes/
Or this one, come to think of it
http://www.espncricinfo.com/series/12712/scorecard/514029/south-africa-vs-australia-1st-test-australia-tour-of-south-africa-2011-12/
I’m not a fan of this anti-Shane Watson approach to reviewing LBWs. Seems particularly dim that the last specialist batsman doesn’t try one.
I’m not much of a fielder, but I can paw at the ground in the vicinity of the ball with the best of ’em.
Turns out you can have a good year with only two innings that aren’t crap, as long as you score 200 in each of them.
????????
Balls. That wasn’t supposed to happen. My kingdom for an edit button.
You have questions, Sam. And I have answers. Here goes:
? No, it’s a mole. They are different.
? Between 3 and 5 on all afternoons.
? Usually yes. But don’t feel pressured.
? Mayonnaise.
? No, they don’t allow concubines.
? Spontaneous Symmetry Breaking.
? Yes, you should categorically deny that.
? Perhaps.
Enjoying this today: https://www.theguardian.com/sport/blog/2010/sep/24/eoin-morgan-ashes-duncan-fletcher
Not that I’m hoping Jimmy gets out quickly, but it’s been a while since someone carried their bat for England – Athers?
Yep. 1997 v NZ, apparently. He scored 94.
Did 295 enter Cook’s mind?
That’s it then. A draw. And that’s the real Ashes.