Careful now

Despite the lack of any actual written opinion in what you wrote, my own father would agree with you completely. It’s as if there is a separate set of language conventions for people over a certain age, in which what is not said is equally important to the meaning as what is said. For instance, three words is all it took to utterly destroy a major aspect of modern social interaction. Nice work.

I would, however, still like to point out the opportunity for tinkering with The Device that the flexible designs offer. While they themselves may be new, the engineering behind them is suitably 19th century. So unlike television and scoring at four-an-over in tests, they’re nothing to be scared of.

This sounds like a great idea, Ged. The Posh Device could be fashioned out of willow for that ‘I’m getting something special for my money’ appeal and thus worthy of the £95 tag. I felled a very large willow tree last year (which, alarmingly, came back on me and nearly wiped me out. Perhaps it didn’t want to be cut down), so I can provide the wood at my regular percentage; 10% of the gross plus additional charges for large vats of linseed oil for that traditional finish. I can also provide a team to undertake careful knocking-in of said device with old leather cricket balls, but latest talks reveal they insist on 10% of the gross plus additional charges for balls that have accrued 80 overs status.

Scorchers on fire!

Bresnan bishes and bashes!

Cricket!

Now we have the whole family assembled on this thread, I have a business idea for you.

Imagine a slightly redesigned version of The Device that carries those ludicrous plastic champagne flute skiffs, common to Lord’s, to which I referred in one of my pieces a few years ago:

http://www.kingcricket.co.uk/england-v-sri-lanka-at-lords-day-three-match-report/2014/10/24/

Emblazon said Posh Devices with the legend “Lord’s – The Home of Cricket” or some such.

Get the Lord’s bars and shops to sell each “Posh Device” for, say, £95 a pop. Anything under £100 is small change to the champagne-swilling, Lord’s-going classes, I assure you.

You should be able to turn a tremendous profit for yourselves and for the MCC this way.

I ask nothing for this exceptional idea beyond my regular percentage; 10% of the gross.

Don’t just sit there reading in awe; get chipping.

Look Bert, as to the state of modern cricket, well in my day … no, I won’t go down the Geoffrey route.

With regard to beer, as a card-carrying CAMRA member I only recognise real ale and Belgian beers of religious origin.

Who is twitter?

“kids these days” – as KC is the only kid, I have I’ll go for a tactful “no comment”.

How dare you. Show some respect to The Device.

That would be an ecumenical matter.