Cornwall could probably use Dowrich as a bat.

https://twitter.com/nathanwpyle/status/1287117761907482624/photo/1

Saw this reposted on your twitter and thought it deserved sharing with the rest of the Kingdom. Somehow an American has managed to summarise the experience of a ’90s-haunted English cricket fan in the guise of space aliens.

Also your point is right. Nobody completely sane would stand in front of Test-class fast bowlers for a living but especially not someone who is not a batsman with Test-class technique…

Excellent news (well, not the bits about the miserable week and the hobbling, the bit where you mention that you survived and that you are recovering).

Thinking about the potential runs Stuart Broad could have scored has made me a bit sad. The previous article made me a bit sad as well. I haven’t read the Eoin Morgan one yet, but it had better be laugh-a-minute…

Think it kind of is, to be honest.

Thanks to you all. I may have expressed myself badly on opiates. They wrecked my digestive system, which was far worse than the surgical pain. I abandoned the pretty much straight away and the pain is fine without them, It just took a while for my body to forgive me for the dalliance. Anyway, enough. This is not what you come here for.

KC, you probably missed Broad being hit because you were in deep in conversation with a bloke named Alan who was wondering where his mates had got to. Either that, or you were showing off your beer bottle opening skills )in the absence of a bottle opener) to anyone around who cared to watch.

You’re better off without opiates, The Smudge. If your body can tolerate OTC anti-inflammatories, they are much safer than opiates and should get you much of the way there with the pain management.

Wishing you better soon. Around here we “give a shit”… as might you, in the absence of opiates.

Facing bowling of that pace is terrifying.

The way he parlays that fear into innings of comedic genius is why he is one of the greatest cricketers of all time.